Hard Times

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I’m reposting this blog entry, just to remind people that no matter how bad it gets, it will change. Now, I didn’t say it would get better – I just said it would change. When I wrote this, I had just met a very nice guy, Mike Ward, who lived in Garfield, Arkansas. We were dating and he was acting serious, and I was not so sure I was ready for that. I had just started a new job, and it was boring me to tears. What I didn’t know is that Mike would ask me to marry him, I would accept his ring at Christmas, and that he would die of lung cancer on May 1, 2013. So see, it gets different. Not necessarily better. BUT, and this is an important but, I met Michael Kaup, almost accidentally, but definitely online, in August 2013. Immediately it was like coming out of the cold and into the warmth of a healthy relationship. Neither of us could believe we got so lucky. So, things change. And sometimes they get better. OK, enough about the old blog post. Enjoy.

Far Out on the Farm


This is not the usual funny post. I don’t feel funny. Today was not a good day, and I had a mini meltdown in the car. I’m not telling you this because I want pity. It’s just that sometimes I think people think I’ve been too glib, too happy and brave for someone in my situation. Not so. I’ve been whistling in the dark. 

I’ve been a widow for nine months now and counting.

When Larry first died, I got a few books on widowhood to help guide me through this transition. They weren’t all that helpful.  I’ve found that I am not like anyone else, and nobody else is, either. I’ve talked to several other people who are dealing with the aftermath of losing a spouse, and none of us have that many shared experiences. The most common denominator is loneliness.

When you lose someone from your life…

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