I’m not, I repeat, NOT a ditz. But a recent set of mishaps (thankfully none of them were dire) in the space of 24 hours has me wondering what kind of strange star was guiding my decisions:
1. Accidentally, I wore earrings that didn’t match; I know what happened — I put a pair on, and decided to change them, and midway through the switch Larry asked me to come help him with something. I walked around like this all night New Year’s Eve and nobody said a blooming thing. And they should have, because these were obviously not matching earrings. And I’m too old to be doing anything creative with my ears. Didn’t notice the problem until I got to Mom’s and started to dress for bed. W0w! I said – I have another pair at home just like them.
2. My grandson lost one of his shoes. Now this isn’t my problem, so to speak, but it did happen while I was there. Brendon, who is 15 months old, just got a brand new pair of running shoes before Christmas. They are really cool – they twinkle when he walks, blinking different colors. He likes to take them off and bang them together, so they explode in a torrent of colorful sparks. One of the pair is now in an undisclosed location. Maybe Dick Cheney has it? Anyway, we searched upstairs and down, and in every nook and under every cranny. We even looked in places he couldn’t possibly have been. Its a conundrum and a mystery, and his Momma is not happy. Of course, she is still angry about dropping a six pack of Seagram’s wine coolers and breaking all but one on the concrete, earlier on New Year’s Eve. And, speaking of wine, I was beginning to think, Gee Willikers! I can really hold my liquor these days, and then I looked at the bottle of wine I was drinking and realized that Arbor Mist is only 6 percent by volume. It was like drinking weak beer from a wine glass, v e r y s l o w l y – s o – I – w o n ‘ t – g e t – s t o n e d.
3. When I left Mom’s, I neglected to pack the laptop. It was still in her dining room in its case, sitting on the chair, waiting for me to pick it up.
4. When I realized I had left my computer, after I unpacked the car, I inadvertently left my cell phone on the charger in the house.
5. When Larry called looking for me so he could ask me if I would please pick up his glasses where he had left them (downstairs at Mom’s, perched on a book he found on her bookshelf that he wanted to read) he heard the phone ring. He tried to call Mom, but she was napping and didn’t hear the phone. Then Larry worried that I had had a breakdown in the car, because I took a long time walking around Wal-Mart buying dinner. And, the breakdown could have happened, but I’m glad it didn’t. I have transmission trouble and I must see a mechanic tout suite.
I’m hoping the worst is over. But if you see me, say, wandering around the county aimlessly looking for something, you’ll kindly steer me toward the direction of my mind? Yes, I knew you would. Thanks!
OK – This morning (Friday) Mom opened her refrigerator and guess what? You got it! She found one very cold baby’s running shoe. Apparently we looked in ALMOST every nook and cranny. My pesky grandson had put the shoe on ice. Literally. A very grateful baby’s Momma called me this afternoon with the news.